Okay, today I’m going to write about something that a lot of people will recognize (or not). My fear of spiders!! I know it’s so silly to be scared of spiders, but I can’t help it! Ever since I can remember I was scared of them. It probably didn’t help that my sister thought it was funny to chase me with a daddy longlegs numerous times! Eeek!!

My mom told me that as a baby I was already really frantic when it came to bugs and loud noises, and she has been my big hero over the years when it comes to spiders (and almost anything else). Without asking questions she always removed them for me, even though she didn’t like them either. Also when I didn’t live at home anymore. About 10 years ago there was this huge spider in my house and I was so scared, I called my mom. She cycled to my house (15 – 20 minutes) at 10PM and removed the spider for me. Bless her! 

She told me that she did the same for my dad when they were younger. Apparently he was also scared of spiders when they were married. I remember spending a weekend with my dad when I was young and asking him to remove a spider from my room, but he said: “Renée, there’s nothing to be scared of. They will not harm you. Just leave them alone and they will not come closer.” Little did I know that he was just as scared for them as I was. Thanks dad! 😛

My difficult relationship with spiders

I understand that it is probably an irrational fear, and the main reason that I’m scared of them is of how they look and their sudden moves. And somehow they always manage to find me. Up until the point where they are ON me, which somehow happens a lot!! I had spiders in my bed (big ones) while sleeping (back then I didn’t wear pajamas, but now I do!), on my face while walking or cycling, in my hair, under my clothes, in my purse. They are everywhere!!!

When Paul and I were traveling in Cambodia, we had a very big, hairy and poisonous spider in our beach hut. Paul tried to flush it away with the shower head, and told me it was gone. Pfew! 

But when I went back to the bathroom, I had this feeling. That little tickle in my lower belly that something wasn’t right. Paul told me the spider was gone, so there was nothing to worry about. I checked behind the toilet, no spider, under the seat, no spider, behind the lid, SPIDER!!!!!

Noooooooooo!!! It was still there! Paul lied! He knew how scared I was, but he couldn’t get rid of it, because it was too fast and strong, so he left it there. For the whole length of our stay, I didn’t use that toilet anymore, but the one in the restaurant.

So you can imagine it’s really hard to get over this fear, when they are always close to me or on me! 

I don’t only have this with spiders, but over the years I’ve been attacked by bees, wasps, and jellyfish. It seems that animals that bite or sting seem to like me very much. Hmm, is it bad karma somehow? 

Over the years I tried many things to get over my fear: Looking at a spider and trying to convince myself that they were harmless or even pretty; trying to understand that they were more scared of us than the other way around; I tried holding a small spider by the tread; watching documentaries about spiders. I even tried to catch them in a glass and put them back outside. This last one I would not recommend. Some of them are so fast, that before you know it, they crawl out or fall on you. Brrr… I have some bad memories of catching spiders.

Maybe one day I will be able to pick one up without being scared and screaming bloody murder. At this point I think that day will happen when hell freezes over.

So there you go, my fear of spiders. Are you also scared of spiders? Maybe you found a solution not to be scared of them anymore? Share your thoughts in the comment section below.